Holiday Hijinks by Roxy Queen

Author:Roxy Queen [Queen, Roxy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Amazon: B00GZ01RRO
Published: 2013-12-06T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 8

I shower and change into the dress I saved for the Christmas party. The dress is cute, but low cut in the front and short at the bottom. It feels awkward now—slutty even. I know I’ve only confirmed Tara and Maddie’s view that I’m the family loser. I can’t even keep my legs together long enough to get through Christmas Day. As far as they know, Carter’s family entrusted ours to take care of him. In their eyes, I broke that trust. Tara’s a mother. I went against some unspoken mom code. A code I’ll never know because I’m stunted emotionally and immature and there’s no way I’ll ever be responsible enough to be someone’s mother.

“I’m sorry,” I tell him. We steal a minute in the hallway. He reaches for my hand, but I move away. “This is so awkward, now. I never should have let you come in there.”

“Since when is all this your responsibility? I thought we’d moved past that particular blame game,” he replies. I see the hurt in his eyes. He doesn’t want me to own this. He wants us to own it. And I’m not ready for that. I’m not sure I ever will be. “Let’s tell Tara the truth.”

“No way.”

“Why? I think it’ll go over better than this.”

“No,” I say, in a final, harsh tone. I turn to leave and he catches me by the arm.

“This is our relationship. Not yours. Remember that.”

“Not here it isn’t.”

The words are unkind and unfair and I yank my arm away, storming off before I say something I regret. Something else I regret. We can smooth this over later.

I follow my mother around the party, knowing no one will bring anything about my past up while I’m helping her. I pass out napkins and refill drinks. I allow Mr. Casey and Mr. Rogers to flirt with me as I pour generous amounts of scotch into their glasses. My father argues politics in his leather chair with the men from the neighborhood. I keep busy. I stay away from Carter, who in turn sticks to Josh like glue. One more day and we’ll be alone and we can repair this clusterfuck on our own terms.

“Ruthie, can you get that? I don’t know who would knock,” my mother says, when we hear the doorbell ring over the talk and music.

I follow orders, passing Maddie on the way to the foyer, her disgusted eyes boring into my back. I ignore her, opening the door with a smile. “Merry Christmas,” I manage to get out. I’m face to face with the Moorefields. Jamie stands behind his mother with an obnoxiously pleased grin on his face. I grit my teeth and say, “Please come in.”

“Let me take your coats,” I say, gathering a pile of wool and fur in my arms. “Go get a drink and some food. Mother will be so happy to see you.” I dash to the room off the front hall and throw the coats on top of the huge pile on the bed.

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